Cold and Empty Hands
by MentallyChallengedNinja
Summary: A series of Aoi and Uruha fics about their love in which they conquer all that challenges them or so they try
1. Chapter 1

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_~Ultimate Uke Gloves~_

_Ever felt like you just NEVER want to let go of that one speical seme's hands?_

_We've got a solution for you!_

_Introducing the one and only Ultimate Uke Gloves, never again will you fear losing that seme's hand!_

_Made with 80% super glue and 20% Gackt's magical Seme fairy dust_

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Aoi sat on the wooden bench watching the snow fall, feeling how it kissed his rosy pink cheeks. He marveled at how perfect each flake was as it fell from the heavens only to be lost in a sea of other snow flakes. Aoi liked winter, but lately he'd been feeling a bit too cold.

"Ha ha," A couple giggled as they walked by the bench oblivious to Aoi; so wrapped up in each others presence. Aoi noticed the pair were holding hands, then slowly he raised his own hands to his face and studied them. They were empty, lonely and so cold; he wished he could have someone to hold hands with and share his body warmth with.

Sighing Aoi turned and looked at the park behind him, the rest of The GazettE were in a heated snowball fight still. Aoi loathed snowball fights, Ruki would always aim for his ass and end up soaking his pants with freezing, melted ice. Aoi couldn't help smile though, as Kai peeked from behind his ramshackle fort and launched an attack of snowballs into Reita's face, nearly knocking off Reita's nose wrap.

"Hey Aoi-chan."

Aoi jumped, startled, and looked up to find Uruha standing awkwardly beside him, "Oh, hey Uruha-chan." Aoi waved his hand a bit, "You wanna sit?"

Uruha smiled embarrassed and pushed his scarf back as he sat beside his fellow guitarist.

"How come you're not playing?" Aoi glanced at Uruha.

"Ruki's aiming for my ass again like the faggot he is," Uruha mumbled, shivering.

"Are you cold Uruha-chan? You have freakin' ten jackets on,"Aoi asked, a little surprised that Uruha was shivering.

"Not really," Uruha glanced at Aoi, their eyes meeting momentarily before Uruha quickly looked away, "Just my hands, Aoi-chan."

Aoi sighed and turned back to watch the snowblal fight.

"Aoi-chan," Uruha began.

"Yeah?" Aoi stayed focused on the game.

"Never mind," Uruha sighed.

For ages Aoi and Uruha sat in silence watching Ruki, Kai, and Reita pummel each other with snow.

"What does he want with me?!" Aoi's mind raced, "Damn I wished his hands wold stop shaking!" then suddenly a light bulb clicked on in Aoi's head.

Slowly, without losing his false concentratoin on the game, Aoi slid his hand towards Uruha's until their fingertips were touching.

"Aoi-chan?" Uruha looked down at their hands.

"Shhhh," Aoi smiled, his fingers lacing between Uruha's.

Aoi smiled wider, no longer did he feel too cold, empty, or lonely, "Uruha-chan..."

"Y-yes?" Uruha's eyes were locked on their clasped hands, "Yes?" Quickly he tore his eyes away from their hands and looked at Aoi.

Aoi's lips were warm, warmer than the ten jackets he wore, soft too! Softer than his cashmere sweater yet strong and caring. Even Aoi's lip peicing was comforting as it pushed against Uruha's lips. Uruha couldn't help but to blush and kiss back.

"Mmmmm," Aoi licked Uruha's chapped lips gently, "You taste like hot chocolate, Uruha-chan...."

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_**** lolz I was really cold when I wrote this story.....I wish I was Aoi xDD_

_*****this is probably going to be one of my lesser smex storries mainly focussed on love not sekkusu -__-"""_

_******don't get mad at me for calling Ruki a faggot ._." ....Uruha said it not me!!! lol j/k I just think that's what Uruha-sama would say xD_

_*******tell me what you think and how the story should go...cuz I'm stuck...and shivering like hell TºT_


	2. Chapter 2

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_Sometimes you just need to be reminded, you ARE beutiful_

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Uruha nudged Aoi gently, "Aoi-kun" he whispered, kissing Aoi's neck gently.

"Nnnn?" Aoi rolled over in the bed pulling the covers over his lean body, and faced Uruha.

Smiling deviant-ly, Uruha glided his hand over Aoi's perfect and warm chest, then his sly fingers locked themselves over Aoi's flannel pajama pants.

Aoi cringed away, pulling back over facing his back to his lover, "No Uruha-kun," he whispered in pain.

"Why!?" Uruha bolted up into a sitting position, throwing the covers off them, "A month! I've known you for YEARS AND DATED YOU FOR OVER A MONTH!" Uruha yelled, making Aoi tremble slightly, "And I can't get fucked!?!?" Uruha grabbed Aoi and with all his might he rolled Aoi over onto his back, "Why!? Am I too hideous?" Uruha cried, glaring into his fellow guitarist's saddened eyes.

"No," Aoi winced and tied to pull away but Uruha had him pinned down to the bed, "I'm...You're...You're too beautiful for me...I'm the," Aoi wrenched his gaze from Uruha's his eyes burning in anger, "I'm the hideous one, I don't deserve you, I'm sorry Uruha-kun, I..." Aoi pulled his arms away from Uruha's slackened and shocked grasp and covered his face with his hands in shame.

"Wh-what?" Uruha gawked at Aoi, "Hideous? What the fuck..." Uruha's mind raced, how, when, why did he think, let alone believe such lies! Aoi was the most beautiful man he'd ever known, no one, not even Miyavi could compare.

Aoi just lay there in shame in silence, Uruha unable to comprehend and think of something to say.

"Wh-who told you? Who was so sick enough to lie? WHO WAS THE ASS TO BREAK YOU," Uruha yelled, unable to control his obvious anger. Throwing one of his legs over Aoi's waist, Uruha straddled him and leaned close to Aoi, "No one," Aoi mumbled. Slowly and careful not to hurt Aoi, Uruha pulled his hands from his face, "Ruki? Reita?" Aoi flinched ad pulled his hands back.

"Re-reita?" Uruha whispered, leaning closer closing his eyes to keep from screaming, his nose gently touching' Aoi's, "He's wrong," Uruha gently kissed Aoi's lips pulling at his piercing softly, trying desperately not to run to Reita and sever off his sadistic ass and tie him to a burning stake.

He pulled Aoi up and off the bed instead, practically dragging the rag doll Aoi to a mirror.  
"Look, my beautiful Aoi!" Uruha giggled, pushing his malice down as to not upset Aoi more, and he stretched out Aoi's bare arms to make them seem like wings.

"Stop," Aoi whispered, trying to pull away.

"No." Uruha wrapped his arms around Aoi's waist and pressed his body against Aoi's back, "Not until you see that Reita was wrong, that you're beautiful"

"I'm NOT!" Aoi growled, pulling away, "Just Stop"

"What the hell is wrong with you!" Uruha yelled, unable to control himself, "You grab my hand! You kiss me, and now you...ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Uruha pulled at his long hair, You make me love you and then you just cringe at my touch!" Uruha glared at Aoi's refection in the mirror, "I can't take it any more, I love you and you just, you won't understand, I'm fed up, I"

"Sorry," Aoi spat out, biting his tongue at the anger his words carried, ashamed of what he had done and was doing to Uruha, the only one to actually care for him in such a long time.

"Sorry doesn't cut it," Uruha sighed, moving towards Aoi's body again, cautiously, then slowly afraid he'd break, slid his fingers down Aoi's arms until he reached his hands. Without thought, Uruha's hands continued to Aoi's pajama pants yet again and began to tug them down.

"No," Aoi protested, but Uruha continued until the pajamas where on the floor along with his metallic pink boxers.

Uruha's mouth fell and his eyes watered, anger and anguish filling him completely as his eyes fell upon the refection of Aoi's thighs."Wh-what..."Uruha slowly fell to his knees, his eyes level to the dozens of red slashes barely even forming scabs, "A-aoi'..." Uruha looked up frightened, stunned, unable to accept what he was seeing.

Aoi's face twisted with disgust, pain and shame. "I'm so sorry," he whispered his voice cracking through gritted teeth, then surprising Uruha, he reached down and tour at his mutilated thighs, his nails digging into his skin making the cuts begin to bleed.

"Stop!!!" Uruha grabbed Aoi's hands and threw them away from his body, "Please don't, No, Never, just," Uruha's eyes were brimming with salted tears threatening to fall.

For what seemed like ages Aoi and Uruha stay completely still, frozen in disbelief and grief, staring blankly at their awkward cold reflection they cast.

Then Uruha reached up and found Aoi's blood covered hands and took them into his own, holding them as if they were his life and stared at Aoi's crimson thighs. Even thought he sight and thought made Uruha's stomach curl up in disgust, he leaned forward until his lips felt Aoi's warm blood. Then tenderly he let his tongue dance across Aoi's thighs, soaking up the precious blood.

"N-no," Aoi's voice cracked more with emotional pain, Uruha's touch sent shivers throughout his body.

Cautiously Uruha's touch moved up Aoi's thigh. "Uruha-kun," Aoi tried to pull away as he felt Uruha encircling him.

Uruha shook his head, sucking gently at Aoi's body.

Aoi couldn't bare to watch and the despised the pleasure Uruha was giving him, he didn't deserve it.

"Say you're beautiful," Uruha growled and continued passionately at Aoi's hardening body.

"No, no no," Aoi cried trying again and again to push away from Uruha.

Uruha just clung tighter and sent more trembles through Aoi's body, "Say it now!" he yelled sucking Aoi's delicate skin a bit more forcibly.

"I-I'm not, I'm beau-beautiful-I'm beautiful Aoi cringed at the sound of his own vice. Slowly he looked back up at the mirror afraid to see his hideous reflection again.

Uruha kissed each of Aoi's thighs then pulled Aoi's belly button piercing, "See, doesn't it feel god to say it, to know it, to feel it.." Uruha looked up at Aoi's face. " you know, you are the most beautiful person I've ever known, I'm lucky to be yours and only yours"

Aoi smiled shyly and gazed down at Uruha, "No promise me you'll never hurt yourself again," Uruha whispered, rising from the floor and embracing his beautiful Aoi.

"I promise," Aoi kissed Uruha on the lips, staring that the reflection he two made, the beautiful reflection.

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***gah...I was inspired by some livejournal fic about Ruki and Kai soo yeah...similiar I guess

.......I HAVE NO IDEA WHY THE HECK I SAW AOI CUTTING HIMSELF...at the time when I wrote this...no as I re-read it...it's WTF xP

zomg I typed this up on a typewriter...and when I put it into my computer all this Japanese and weird symbols were like in every line (it took me just as long to type as it did to rid my story of those symbols T___T)

enjoy ^___^ and review!

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